Falling In Love At 10,000 ft.

Statistics show that dating couples are more likely to fall in love if they do something fun. I think it's because the thrilling experience releases happy brain chemicals and then we associate those chemicals with the person we had fun with and then we want to hang out with them more and then we get bored so we start kissing. But I think real love is more than a happy chemical.
Some people spend the rest of their life trying to rediscover a feeling that they mistook for love the first time. If I wanted to trick someone into falling in love with me, then I would take them skydiving. I've never been skydiving but I'm sure it would do more than put twitterpated butterflies in someone's stomach. I could even serenade them with a guitar on the way down. That would give new meaning to 'falling' in love.
But realistically, I want to find someone who I can do anything or nothing with and still be delighted, because I enjoy them. I don't want our relationship to be based on a past adrenalline rush, because once that experience is gone we will be left staring at each other and hoping that we have something more in common. And I don't want to someday find myself waking up next to a stranger.
Love is often portrayed as something that happens to us. Like Cupid. Sometimes that pudgy little angel shoots people in the butt with an arrow and they can't help but fall in love. They have no choice, it's Cupid's fault. Or so they say. The idea is that love finds us. But I don't like this idea because it means that we are simply victimized by love. Love comes and goes and we can't do anything about it. So, we are not held responsible. On the contrary, I do believe that we have a freewill and that we have a choice when it comes to falling in love. I don't believe that we can choose to fall in love with anybody. I've tried and it doesn't work. But I believe that when the opportunity to 'fall in love' presents itself, then we have a choice to step over the edge or back away. Once we step over the edge it becomes more difficult to slow the acceleration process. And if it doesn't work out, then hopefully we had thought about it and strapped on a parachute before we jumped.

I've also heard it said that love is a commitment. That sounds noble upon first hearing until you actually think about it. Then you realize that the statement plants both feet in the same realm as heartless religion. Religion commits to following procedure, but cares nothing for God. 'Love is a commitment' might be true if it is mixed with some other things. And when all else fails then perhaps commitment will be the only thing holding a relationship together. But only by a thread. I think when a relationship reaches that point then it's not time to shrug and take a nap. It's time to fight for the pulse of love.
Some married people seem to value the commitment more than the person they are commited to. That saddens me. It saddens me that a sweetheart could be reduced to being a lifelong ball and chain. To be fair, this is all easy for me to say since I'm not married. But often it is easy to think more clearly when you are outside of a situation, rather than when you're in the eye of the storm. And perhaps someday, when I am married, I will come back and read this blog to remind myself that love is worth rescuing. Maybe, love is a commitment to fight for love. Getting warmer.
I saw a sign in front of a church that quoted Jesus as saying "If you love me then keep my commandments." That is a sobering thought. And yet someone could try to keep the commandments without loving Jesus. He didn't say that love IS keeping my commandments, but that IF we love Him, then we are to keep His commandments. That is very big difference and a very big IF. It begins with love. Love can be confirmed by compliance. Commitment is a sort of mutual compliance. But once again, compliance itself doesn't complete the picture of love. Afterall, God is love, He loves us and yet far be it from Him to obey our commands.
On a similar note, in the infamous John 3:16 passage, it says that "God so loved the world THAT He gave His one and only Son." Notice how it all started with love. The giving was both compelled and completed by a pre-existing love. Now, if God had not offered anything to redeem mankind, then it would be difficult to believe that He loved us. What good parent upon seeing their child drowning wouldn't jump in without a second thought? Even if it was the child's fault? Even if it was dangerous for the parent? Love that is not demonstrated is worthless to the one who is loved. And God's love is stronger that an earthly parent's love. To be quite clear, God didn't have to offer His Son, and He still would've been good and just. But He did so because He so loved. His love was not created but confirmed in the giving. He had a choice, but irrational love made up His mind.